25
by Bearbutt
Summary: Twenty-five years of building birdhouses and empty plans. One of these days she was going to leave this place. A peek into the life of Mary Margaret Blanchard's life. [[Red Snow, Snowing, MM/Whale]]


This is my first time writing for Once Upon a Time, so I'm a little nervous sharing. The curse is really quite fascinating and could use to be elaborated on more. This fic is partly inspired by a similar one about Henry growing up in Storybrooke and being the only person who ever ages. Living in some kind of timeless limbo would drive anyone a little batty.

The style is disjointed on purpose. It's to convey a lack of continuity in Mary Margaret's life. Let me know if it's too confusing.

Also, Rumplestiltskin is a meddling shipper and you can't convince me otherwise.

Pairings: Mostly Red Snow and Snowing with brief mention of MM/Whale.

_Suggested listening: Swingset Chain by Loquat, or 22 by Lily Allen._

_-B_

**1987**

* * *

Mary Margaret hated the smell of apples. It was a well-known fact around the school. Her students gave her pears instead.

Yet, every year there was a freshly baked apple pie delivered to her front doorstep on her birthday. It was the only way she remembered the date. Attached to the pie would be the same red, heart-shaped card with a note.

_"From Mom and Dad"_

She'd think that her parents would know her hatred of the fruit. She tried eating the gift every year. Every year she spent the morning of her birthday with her head over the toilet bowl.

Mary Margaret came to dread her birthday. Well, she dreaded it when she thought of it, which wasn't very often. She didn't think of much very often. Her brain felt like bits of cotton fluff. Grey and floaty.

* * *

**1990**

* * *

According to fourth grade science, brains were grey, but looked more like spaghetti than cotton. She knew this because Ali Dong-wu made a scale model of the human brain for the science fair every year. She wondered if it was the same one or if he remade it each time.

"Have you thought about volunteering your time, Dearie? I hear the hospital has been looking for people to read to the patients."

Mary Margaret forgot where she was but, Mr. Gold was there. Why was Mr. Gold there? Was it rent day already?

"I'll get you this month's rent." She said.

"Take my advice. They say helping people less fortunate is the best cure for depression."

She listened to his cane and steps fade away.

Was she depressed? Mary Margaret searched her feelings. She didn't feel sad, or too strongly about anything to be honest. Being at school made her happy. The children's smiling faces made her sad. Why was she sad? Maybe she should see Archie.

Archie would tell her to spend less time sleeping and more time helping others. She heard somewhere that helping the needy was good for the soul. Where had she heard that? She was so tired. Instead of grocery shopping, she'd settle for cereal tonight.

* * *

**1993**

* * *

It was her birthday again, and instead of staring at the pie left in the trash can, Ruby was taking her out. Her friend's slim form eclipsed her mirror. Ruby exaggerated a pout as she coated her lips with black and red. Her hair was teased, which was the fashion. Or it was. She hadn't picked up a magazine in a while.

She signed up to volunteer at the hospital yesterday. Already she was feeling much better. These people needed her. The purpose was refreshing.

"Are you sure you want to go to the Cauldron tonight? We could always drive down to Boston." Ruby said.

Mary Margaret shrugged. Her shoulder pads almost reached her ears when she did that. Ruby smiled rakishly at her before pushing her own messy hair away from her ears.

"Let's do it. Let's leave tonight! We can go anywhere we want. Santa Monica, Paris, I've always wanted to go to Niagara Falls. New York isn't too far away either. Come on, M-an-M, we could sleep in Stanley Park and watch shows on Broadway."

Mary Margaret chuckled, "Yeah, the Big Apple."

That night she watched Ruby flirt with the same four men who already knew her bed. She took home none of them and instead staggered home arm in arm with Mary Margaret.

Her steps were uneven, but Ruby paused to stare at the moon overhead.

"I want to run." She said quietly.

Mary Margaret hummed in agreement. She just didn't know where to run to.

They fell into bed together. Ruby made love with an intensity of someone out for revenge. It was like she was trying to forget something and make up for it at the same time. She liked to smoke after sex, which Mary Margaret chastised her for. Ruby would roll her eyes and put it out before kissing her again. She kicked and whimpered in her sleep, and was always gone in the morning.

Mary Margaret would wake up to coffee with proof of Ruby's handiwork in the lipstick kiss on the rim.

* * *

**1996**

* * *

The movie Groundhog Day was playing at the theatre. It felt like the movie was always playing at the theatre, which she supposed was the irony of it. She felt a strange kinship to Bill Murray, sleepwalking day after day in the same monotony. Time never changed in small town Maine.

She wondered if Marco would get around to fixing the clock tower this year.

Mayor Mills helped out with the school's Halloween festival this year. That was new. Regina's fake smile as she offered cups of mulled cider made Mary Margaret's teeth itch. For the life of her, she didn't know why.

* * *

**1999**

* * *

It was the end of the millennia. She couldn't believe she lived to see it. Why, it felt like '87 was just yesterday. Had it really been thirteen years? She must have been in high school then. It felt like she had been teaching the fourth grade forever.

"What the fuck happened to March?" Ruby said.

They were sitting in Granny's with the rest of the town. Instead of the bar, they went the more family-friendly route. Granny wanted Ruby to start taking her responsibilities more seriously.

"I still haven't been to Beijing yet." Her friend lamented.

"What about that trip you were going to take with Wayne?"

"He needs to take care of his mom. He cupboards were practically bare when he visited her last."

"Damn shame. I'm sure you'll get to go soon." Mary Margaret stirred her hot chocolate.

"9... 8... 7... 6..."

They kissed when the clock hit one. She wondered if the 2000s would be any different from the 1990s.

* * *

**2002**

* * *

John Doe fascinated her. He looked like a prince as he slept. His nose had the perfect slope and his lips were like Cupid's bow. Mary Margaret feigned indifference as she replaced the vase of flowers on his bedside table. She wondered who had given him the flowers.

Doctor Whale asked her if she wanted to go see the new Star Wars yesterday. She didn't really want to. The new Star Wars movies confused her. She remembered seeing the adventures of Luke and Leia in theatres just a few years ago. Were prequels really necessary after such a short wait?

Whale had a nice face. He went to the gym. She could do worse. It's not like she was waiting for true love or something.

* * *

**2005**

* * *

The students were learning archery as a part of their special Physical Education this year. As a lark, she held the bow for them. They begged her to try and hit the target with them. Mary Margaret laughed and pulled the string back. Her muscles moved faster than her brain. The arrow whizzed through the air and landed with a thud.

Bullseye.

The red on white contrast seemed to overcome her vision. It felt like blood on her lips and the sweetness of apples. A raspy voice in her ears telling her to let go.

_"I'll catch you."_

She whipped around, feeling eyes on her, Mayor Mills stood at the edge of the field.

And the colour faded away.

* * *

**2008**

* * *

Mayor Mills had a son named Henry. She wondered if she already knew that. Either way, he was enrolled in Mrs. Lagle's class. She spoke about him in the staff room. He was a very bright young man, but detached. His mother habitually showed up in the middle of class to meddle with her teaching methods. Mary Margaret was glad Henry wasn't in her class. She didn't like the Mayor much. Something about Regina just rubbed her the wrong way.

Maybe she'd take a vacation in a year or so. Ruby mentioned wanting to see Hawaii.

On her way home from work she stopped for groceries. She was out of tea and needed to buy something for dinner. She was hovering in the meat section when she was flagged down by Mr. Gold.

"Ah, Ms. Blanchard. You're looking in fine form. How goes volunteering at the hospital? Meet any cute male nurses?"

She wondered how Mr. Gold knew about her volunteering. Or why he cared about her love life. The man creeped her out. He always made her feel like a fly caught helplessly in a spider's web. He was a slender bug, all knotted joints and big eyes.

"Fine, and no. Good day."

In the checkout she watched a little girl convince her mother to buy a chocolate bar. The girl's golden curls bounced with each movement of her head. She laughed and the sound was like music. Everything the sound touched seemed to glow the colour of the girl's hair.

Mary Margaret loaded the groceries into her car and turned on the radio. She sang along to Karen Carpenter and cried all the way home.

She had spaghetti for dinner. She stirred the beef and noodles into a frown on her plate. After the dishes she watched an episode of Buffy. Hard to believe the show ended two years ago.

The next morning she decided to renovate her office and turn it into a second bedroom.

* * *

**2011**

* * *

That morning she looked at her reflection in a spoon before school. She wasn't sure if it was the distortion or the metal, but her face looked drawn and grey. She was in the prime of her youth. Why was it that she looked like such an old maid? Maybe Ruby was right about the two of them taking a weekend trip to Vermont. They could go sailing.

As she left the apartment that morning she smelled smoke. That was new. She wasn't even sure if the smoke detectors worked. Gold was slimy enough to be a slum lord.

Nevertheless, she called the superintendent and the sheriff.

"Shouldn't you be calling the fire department?" Graham said.

"I thought it was all one number."

"Good point. I'll get someone on it. I'm busy today."

She left the keys under the mat for the fire department. Or Graham. She had to get to school. They were making birdhouses. The kids loved doing this. It was their favourite project.

Henry Mills was in her class this year and dealing with his mother was a colossal pain in the ass. Regina couldn't let anyone do their job. She'd hover and nitpick classroom practices to make an 'ideal learning environment' for Henry. To his credit, the boy looked equally exasperated at his mother's requests and seemed embarrassed about the whole thing.

Mary Margaret couldn't help but admire the colour of the boy's eyes. They were a shade of blue-green much like her own. Regina had brown eyes. Henry was adopted. She remembered the big deal Regina had made about other students bullying him for that reason. Saying things like 'his real parents didn't want him'. Such a thought offended Mary Margaret personally.

She arrived at school at 7:15 to meet Larry about getting the right amount of lumber. She felt a certain kinship for the man, despite his grumpiness.

"You look like crap." He said.

"Yeah, I think I might be coming down with something."

Henry wasn't in school today. She hoped he was okay. If he wasn't, she'd be hearing about it from-

And there she was, parting the tide of students racing out for recess. (Despite their teacher telling them not to run.)

"Miss Mills, what are you doing here?"

"Where's my son?"

Regina was talking to her, but Mary Margaret's eyes were fixed on the woman lingering by the door. She had blonde curls and wide eyes, looking constantly startled.

"Who is this?"

"I'm... I'm-"

"She's the woman who gave birth to him." Regina sneered.

Oh. Henry had stolen her credit card and went off to visit his birth mother. This lovely, sad-looking woman. It was probably inappropriate to hug this stranger. Regina was still talking, then storming off and knocking books off tables because she was so mature.

Mary Margaret bent to pick the books up and the woman stopped to help her. She seemed kind. She was anxious about Henry, and overwhelmed by the situation in general. Something about her smile made the colour of her red leather jacket stand out.

Talking to her led to Mary Margaret embarrassing herself. She stammered an apology. What did she know about adopted kids anyway? Her own parents wanted and loved her. They remembered her birthday every year and sent her pie.

"I just wanted to give him hope. Something to hold onto when all else fails."

The woman smiled at Mary Margaret. The quirk of her lips was uneasy, but it felt like sunshine to the school teacher.

"I don't think I caught your name."

"Emma. Emma Swan."

The name stirred something in Mary Margaret's brain. She felt a jolt of recognition, and then lost it seconds later. It was like having to sneeze and then it going away. (According to fourth grade biology facts, the human heart stops when you sneeze.)

She thanked her and left. Mary Margaret felt like she should be thanking Emma instead. For what reason she wasn't sure. The halls seemed brighter as she headed back to class. At that moment, she was glad to be visiting the hospital later. She wanted to tell someone about Emma and John Doe was a very good listener.


End file.
